rekindled union

Last week,my clinical practice chair informed me I will undergo training-orientation in one hospital and Operating Room (OR) is the chosen area.Floors/wards and delivery rooms(DR) I am accustomed with.I cringed with anxiety. I am already way crass in the field,I am still familiar with the principles though: aseptic/sterile technique,surgical handwashing,gloving and so forth. In spite of the humongous fear inside me, I bravefully set my mind I will go with it. Time to face uncertainties and step out of my comfort zone.This is it,pancit!!!

Together with two clinical instructors Ma'am Au and Raidis, we recollected the OR instruments.Allis and bobcock have always been my favorites and I never forget their semblance,I don't know why.There was confusion between a thumb and tissue forceps,my technique: teeth=tissue.:) We were apprehensive yet very eager to relearn and recall all that we needed to know in the area.We were on with it with much gusto.We carefully observed actual surgical procedures such as Caesarian section(CS) with bilateral tubal ligation(BTL) and cholecystectomy. At home, I pulled out and read the OR manual.

OR instruments

Suction and cauterize.

Mayo table

On our second day of orientation, my company "forced" me to be the instrument nurse for a scheduled surgery. Good thing there was no CCTV installed in the theater lest my rattled face was captured. I was soooo hesitant,it was only when the senior OR nurse calmly told me,"Eka tatakut,turuanan da na ka man,"that I finally succumbed to the task. I did surgical handwashing,gowning,closed gloving,mayo table preparation,counting of instruments as ideally as I remember how. My hands and knees were teetering. As I was doing the works, I quietly prayed to Jesus to please,please help me. I even talked to Papang to pray for me too.

The procedure began with a prayer. OH mmmm!!! There I was,passing the instruments to the surgeon( he was very patient) and suture nurse. They moved quickly yet efficiently. I was like in  a whole new world,it felt really surreal. Knife.Clamps.Metz. Clamp.Allis. Thumb,no tissue. Prepare Chromic 1-0.Mayo. Straight. Count instruments.Ready cotton.Closing.Final counting. Gents and ladies, I propitiously survived!!Two things that scared me the most: ma-scrub out ako and incomplete count of instruments. They did not happen.Yeeyyyy!!My gratitude for my neurons that were suddenly active after years of hibernation in OR,Raidz and Ma'am Au were beside me supporting me(we were all able to assist),the staff nurses that offered the necessary help,and the considerate surgeon.

I am a registered nurse. However, I humbly admit there are  quite a number of tasks and procedures which I still need to polish,practice and procure some more,and OR skills top the list. To be back in the theater and don the gown as a scrub nurse brought me exhilaration and accomplishment. It truly feels good to be back in my first-loved area in college-the Operating Room. On a more personal note,I mustered enough courage to block my apprehension with the tiny yet deep hope that someday,I'd get to scrub for my Mc Dreamy.

Till the next surgery.